Tech Support, by Russell Conover

Samuel was fed up with his Internet connection. It had been cutting out multiple times a day, despite him trying numerous troubleshooting techniques. When nothing worked, he growled and called tech support.

“What can you do?” he asked firmly.

“Well, the characteristics you described are unusual. But, we have a special consultant, from whom we haven’t heard in a while, who could help.” The call was transferred.

Samuel again described his issue to the consultant. “I know your problem,” she stated immediately. “Your connection is coming from Pluto. We’ll set you up with something more local. No extra charge, either!”

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